Sometimes there’s and empty void that you try to fill with so many things, that it needn’t have ever existed. But when you stop and think and look under all the things you tried to top-up your world with, you’re left with an even bigger empty space. So you work harder and faster and smarter, avoiding anyone and anything that reminds you or even associates with you. You’re left with a mere fragment of who you used to be. Except this used to be you is no you, it’s some distant memory or someone who used to be. Everything that was so familiar becomes un-resonate. You laugh and smile for people but in those cold hours of the night when you remember what was, you recognize that nothings the same. Sometimes, you stop and recognize that the empty void is all that is left. It’s all empty and full of meaningless emptiness, it makes no sense, because none of it matters.
Throwing yourself at life means creating more meaningless empty fillers, yet nothing works. You forget for a little while and in those moments you feel a little bit like it doesn’t matter, then you realize that it does matter, because that empty void is all there is. Because that empty void is now the new you. What happened changed you forever, you don’t believe anymore, you don’t want anymore, you don’t have or need anymore. Because you are not you anymore!
When considering the past, enjoy and live in the moment but never let the void take over, because when it does there is no way back.
Forever changed. Me.
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