2013

As this year draws to a close. I feel the theme is goodbye. Every year has a theme a way of leaving a mark. 

To be honest as the years go by, I realise each year has it's own way of twisting and turning and changing everything. I'm yet to see it getting better. Worse yes. 

January brought new friendship, with the demise of old friendships, lies and drama insighted February. Everything led to the peak of 2013. I ended up on a lone discovery tried to Iraq and Iran. Let's not complain that was amazing. I will never forget seeing that golden dome, the golden face, or saying goodbye. I know that walking out of the haram of imam Ali as was the hardest moments of my existence. My soul still weeps at the glimpse of those last moments.

Babies. Babies, I have witnessed the incubation of 6 children in 2013. I realised the value of a mother and how much pregnancy puts a woman through. 

Everything in 2013 didn't end there. I lived out my lifelong dream. All be it torn. I saw the ka'ba. After years, I walked the streets of the Holy City holding hands with my mum, circled His house. As we walked through I look ped down til I dared to see, I dreamt of seeing all my life, when I saw I squeezed her hand told her to look up and cried. Cried for the amazing moment, for the emotion and relief. I was famous for choosing my three wishes, I planned them for years. Years, when I say years I mean years. I was shocked by what my soul wanted. 

It hurts now to know my wish didn't come true and probably was deemed to never be mustajaab. That's what happens when you rise too high. 

The end of 2013 in tears, I wanted, wished and ached to go to Najaf. That's my wish for 2013. Take me to my home, where my soul lives. 

Lemonade

In life you're landed with situations and people you dont want or need. What you dont realise at the time is that it's all for your best. There's good that comes out of everything. 

People and things come into your life to teach you. To train you for your next calamity. Everything happens to teach you to cope. To deal with whats coming next. The hurt and pain teaches you to expect less and give more. You learn to stop fighting against the tide and to flow with it. Each wave carrying you with it. You land up where you need to be. Not where you want, not where you expected to be, just where you're meant to be. 

That's the deal with lemonade. You squeeze the lemons only to refresh for the next battle. One day it will all be over. The peices will mend and the voids will fill, it will all have a reason. Till then you smile, and keep yourself alert for whats next.